STAYING SPIRITUALLY CONNECTED WHILE SOCIALLY DISTANT
In the time of COVID-19, we likely find ourselves stressed and looking for ways to salvage connection in quarantine. Here are some ideas to make it through this time of social distancing without losing spiritual connection. Remember: in a time when we have plenty of pressure on us, no one is saying to do them all. These are just ideas if you’re struggling to stay connected to your faith in light of this pandemic.
Prayer resources online
Forward Movement has compiled a wealth of online resources for worship and I highly recommend you check it out! Also, continue to check in here at Earth & Altar. We are accepting COVID-19 related submissions, so if this time of social distancing gives you space to reflect and you want to share, we’d love to hear from you. Additionally, while you can use other ways and means to achieve it, maybe you just want to spend some time in The Book of Common Prayer, exploring The Daily Office, The Great Litany, Prayers and Thanksgivings, and other prayers for the sick (found under Pastoral Offices).
Pray specifically for people directly impacted by COVID-19
The sick, older people who are more vulnerable, the immuno-compromised, countries experiencing especially wide spreading illness related to the virus, children who will go hungry without the aid of meals at school, the homeless who are told they must wash their hands and stay inside while having neither soap nor place to go, people who will suffer financially, those who suffer from anxiety and depression that isolation may exacerbate, those without internet connections, the lonely who feel their loneliness compounded, the especially lonely in nursing homes or hospitals who may not be able to have the visitors they depend on for joy, the already marginalized who might be struggling with further isolation, and the list goes on. Consider holding them in prayer to be at the heart of your prayer life and the top priority in your spiritual life. If you can’t hold this list in your head (I can’t!), use this COVID-19 litany by Michael Kurth to remind you of some of the people you can pray for.
Sunday worship, but make it virtual
Check in with your local congregation or congregational group (diocese, synod, presbytery, etc.) and ask about virtual options for Sunday worship, as that is how most communities will be worshipping for the next few weeks at least. This past Sunday, I had fun with it. I told my social media outlets where I was “going” and that I had spots open beside me in my “sofa-pew.” When people replied that they were also watching, we sent emoji waves and sent tweets like, “The peace of the Lord be always with you.” Let this be a new and fun way of engaging with worship, rather than viewing it as a sad consequence. If you are especially feeling the absence of receiving the wine and/or bread, check out these prayers for “spiritual communion” from Forward Movement.
Do not forsake the social part of your worshipping community
If you have social groups in your congregation, try to get them to go virtual as well. Spend some time just hanging out, because our need to have friendship and companionship with fellow worshippers will not go away. I saw screenshots of youth groups meeting this past Sunday via Zoom, but don’t stop there. Have your supper groups, preparing meals inside your home and then logging into a video chat. Try to still have coffee hour, but with Keurigs and in pajamas after worship.
Turn to the saints
This is an especially important time for us to remember that we have saints in the history of our Christian faith who lived and served throughout times of disease or who are known for ministering to the ill. Some examples include St. Francis of Assisi, Mother Teresa, St. Roch, but there are many more. They are models of the Christian faith for us, as they traversed difficult times by the power of their faith, showing us that we can do the same. At Earth & Altar, we will reflect on some of these saints over the next few weeks, but I’ll also remind you that it’s never too late to join the party over at Lent Madness.
Create a sacred space in your home
Many of us are feeling the void of not being able to have that place where we go to worship. We feel stuck inside of our homes, with our dishes staring at us at every turn (which is half of the reason we were always so excited to leave in the first place). More importantly, some of us are missing how we would smell incense, light candles, kneel in pews before worship, listen to the organ play while we said our own prayers before the procession began. We yearn to hold old books in our hands, yellowed by thousands of prayers and the fingerprints of the faithful. If that’s the case, I’d like to suggest that you create a sacred space inside your home where you can “go” to church. Try to find a candle you love, an incense you already have or that you can purchase online (especially if it is from a local vendor who delivers!); grab your prayer book, your hymnal. Create a playlist of your favorite hymns. You might even say a prayer in which you ask God to set aside this space to be, for you, the place where you pray when you cannot access the holy ground that seems to so beautifully ground you.
Still reach out to your priest/pastor/minister/spiritual director/therapist
Priests and pastors still want to help you! Every clergy person I know is stuck at home, wishing they were with their people. Don’t forget that your ministers still love you and want to support you in the ways that are possible for them right now. Ask your therapist and/or spiritual director if they can meet via Skype/Zoom/FaceTime for a while. If you do not currently have a therapist, consider some options for online therapy. If therapy is a challenge for you financially (it has been for me, so many times), ask your health insurance provider about sessions per year free, and if you do not have insurance, try to ask for what you need (I know it is so hard!) and ask for a sliding scale. We are all aware of the unique challenges of being alive right now and I have hope that many therapists will know how much people need their services and offer more sliding scale options. You can also check out this article that offers strategies to finding affordable therapy. NAMI offers a helpline and opportunities to text with someone during a crisis, their own updates regarding COVID-19, as well as many other mental health resources. No matter what: you are not alone.
Offer “office hours” for virtually connecting with others
Pick a few hours each week, block them out on your calendar, and let people close to you know you are available to talk by phone, talk back and forth via text, FaceTime, or hop onto Skype. It might sound silly, because people can connect any time in these ways it seems, but sometimes people (especially those who might be depressed) can struggle with feeling like they would be a bother if they reached out, so the explicit invitation can be very important. Plus, it is a way to prioritize connection and loving the people close to you.
Don’t lose your sense of humor, if you can help it
I know that I am the Lifestyle & Humor editor, so it might feel like I am contractually obligated to tell you to stay humorous, but hear me out and remember that I do not get paid for this. This is not a fleeting, silly suggestion; this is actually something I find almost non-negotiable right now. You will be inundated by reasons to fret, despair, and lose hope, all of which are understandable. You might have to fight to keep your sense of humor and I want to impress upon you that it is worth the fight. Our sense of joy, laughter, and the willingness to acknowledge the absurdity of life--these don’t denigrate the situation we are in, they fortify us to see the days to come. I want to be clear: I don’t mean making fun of COVID-19; I mean making sure we are actively engaging in humor while we are moving, day to day, through the inevitable uncertainties. It’s important to note that some may not be able to do this right now, due to their circumstances, and we must always meet people where they are, understanding that we don’t always have the capacity for humor, and that’s valid. We are already seeing late night shows go off the air for a while, comedy shows are being rescheduled, etc., but you still might be able to use Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime, Disney+ and even free YouTube videos to access movies and television that can lighten the heart during a time when our hearts feel weighed down. Consider listening to a comedy podcast or reading a book by a favorite comedian. We can remain vigilant and laugh at the same time. Staying open to the joys and comedy in life during our trials is a spiritual discipline.
Don’t forget to log out
Continue to practice social media boundaries, or implement them. As we rely on social media more to hold us together, we still need to have time when we are not staring into phones, computers, or TVs (she writes, staring into a computer). It’s vitally important that we spend time doing non-virtual tasks, because the long term health effects of too much social media still apply.
Turn off the news sometimes and consume media that is not news
While it is important for us to stay up to date on the news and regulations regarding COVID-19 to protect the vulnerable, the updates we need will be waiting on us after we take a break from the news. A good rule of thumb might be to check in 2-3 times a day, as updates really do seem to be pouring in quite often. But another rule of thumb might be: anything vitally important will likely be widely shared and at the top of your collated list of recent posts whenever you log back in after a refreshing break. Years ago, my friend The Rev. Katie Churchwell wrote an article titled “Praying Facebook.” You might consider looking at the news as prayerfully as possible, reading the stories you find through scrolling as if they are prayer requests. You can also take this same posture as you read posts and reactions from friends, as they manage social distancing and the natural fears associated with this pandemic. Put some other forms of media into rotation, like fun magazines with stories and beautiful photography, or narrative-based podcasts, so that you are taking in some information and stories that aren’t directly related to COVID-19. You may have a love for learning and that should continue! But you don’t have to only learn about the pandemic.
Continue to have a schedule, as much as you can
I say this as someone who works full time as a remote employee after almost 8 years of having an office: try to create a schedule as much as your life will allow. I don’t mean to say it needs to be militant, but that our lives are benefited by having a cadence, a rhythm. We pray the Daily Office, because we believe that ordering our days through prayer, letting prayer set the rhythm and cadence of our days, is helpful to us, and I think giving ourselves the cadence that outside forces may have given us before is helpful now.
Be patient with others
In this time, one way we might help others “know we are Christians by our love” is through patience. I can’t help but think of people in any delivery service capacity, tech support, the people working at our grocery stores, healthcare professionals, governmental agencies, all people working hotlines, teachers and school administrators, and myriad other professions full of people who are not only still encountering people, but encountering people at their most stressful. We are all human; we will all lose our patience with someone over the next few weeks. And if you think you are the exception to the rule, I’m happy to snap at you later today, because I believe in practicing what I preach. All joking aside, tensions are high, so we might ask God to give us hearts of patience and gentleness, so that we can minister through that patience and gentleness to the people who are still working, still risking, so that we can receive things during this time.
Remember that people are not the problem
Unfortunately, our human nature might quickly send us into the paranoid world of viewing others through a simple question: Do they have COVID-19 or don’t they? My friend The Rev. Dr. Kara Slade perfectly noted, “This kind of suspicion is spiritually corrosive over time.” If we encounter someone who is sick, we should surely be careful, but we should also approach them with a heart of mercy. Anne Lamott, in her book Hallelujah Anyway: Rediscovering Mercy, defines mercy as follows: “Mercy means compassion, empathy, a heart for someone’s troubles. It’s not something you do – it is something in you, accessed, revealed, or cultivated through use, like a muscle.” The call for the Christian during COVID-19 is just that: How will we show mercy? How will we cultivate this mercy muscle, so that when we encounter someone we refuse the question, “Do they have it or don’t they?” and instead emphatically answer “yes” when asked, “Do you have a heart for their troubles?”
Pray especially for a heart of abundance
I can’t open a social media account without seeing a picture of an empty shelf. Grocery stores are shortening hours so they can restock. We have the opportunity to be people of abundance in a world of scarcity. We believe that God will give us our daily bread, that manna appears to us even in the wilderness, that right when we think we cannot see another day, widows and ravens might feed us. We have no reason to hoard, because we are connected as one body of Christ through one Lord, one faith, one baptism. Now, more than ever, our belief in our common humanity and the interconnectedness of what happens when God creates us in God’s image become the foundational truths of our faith that can be the firm foundation that eases our stress, the firm foundation that helps us trust just enough in God’s provision that we only take what we need.
Over the next few weeks, months, in the unforeseen future: Know that I am holding the whole Earth & Altar community, including you, in prayer. May we be for others a living invitation to join us as we pray and ask for God’s peace and guidance during this uncertain time.
